Gender differences in workplace communications

Canberra Times (March 19) contains an article on gender differences in workplace communications. Documenting the views of several communication and career experts, the article presents specific examples of communication differences and common misunderstandings.

The root of the problem, the article states, is that women express themselves indirectly, often using the conjunctive [serving to connect elements of meaning within sentences] which men misunderstand. The aim of women is to create closeness and a good work environment. The article uses the example when women hear the sentence, “The printer ink has to be changed,” they connect it to an outcome, such as that someone has to change the ink. The article states that men hear the communication only as a statement that is either true or false, and not necessarily with an outcome attached to it. Another example is that women say, “Shouldn’t we call a meeting?” in order for the majority to be involved in the decision or outcome.

Additionally, women think and speak communally. Women are also mostly socialized according to non-hierarchical communication. For example, during meetings, women make suggestions openly and address everyone in the room. Often their ideas dissipate and appear to be “not heard.” To men, it appears that the ideas are not directed at anyone specifically, therefore they often take the idea and re-present it as their own – but this time, they direct the idea more directly and specifically to the heads of the organization, and they are heard.

Men, on the other hand, are more issue-driven and goal-oriented, and are socialized according to hierarchical rules of communication. Men in meetings, therefore, generally address the highest ranking people in the room directly. The article states that men respond to direct sentences, such as “There will be a meeting on Monday at four o’clock.”

Non-verbal cues also appear to have gender differences in the workplace. Women often nod their head to show that they are listening in meetings (whether they agree or not). Men think that nodding means agreement. Women may use more direct eye contact in conversation to create rapport and connections. Men may interpret the face to face approach as too personal or aggressive.

Becky Mulvaney from the Department of Communication at Florida Atlantic University argues that cross-gender communication occurs in patterns, habits, and traditions across cultures, and thus gender differences are forms of intercultural communication. She bases her argument on both classical and contemporary theories of communication. She adds that, although there may be cultural or gender differences, it is not productive to assume that all men communicate in one way and all women communicate in another. That would be too simplistic.

Mulvaney claims that women generally reflect their role in social order by adopting communication approaches such as questions, qualifiers, and fillers to soften their message. Qualifiers are words such as very, quite, rather, somewhat, more, most, less, least, too, so, just, enough, indeed, still, almost, fairly, really, pretty, even, a bit, a little, a whole lot, a good deal, a great deal, kind of, and sort of. Men adopt more direct statements (rather than questions), less qualifiers (using phrases such as it is, it will be, it can, and it does), and less fillers (they make a statement and generally don’t explain it). Therefore, just as both genders contribute to the workplace, the gender differences in communication also contribute to the workplace in areas such as day-to-day activities, decision making, strategizing, and management. 

MARTINA NICOLLS is an international aid and development consultant, and the author of:- The Shortness of Life: A Mongolian Lament (2015), Liberia’s Deadest Ends (2012), Bardot’s Comet (2011), Kashmir on a Knife-Edge (2010) and The Sudan Curse (2009).