Should we strive to be happy all the time?

There appears to be a backlash against ‘constant’ happiness. Do we need to be happy all the time? Should be strive to be happy all the time?

Harvard Business Review (July-August 2015) has an article exploring the ‘happiness backlash’ by investigating the ‘seemingly universal insistence on feeling good.’ The author, Alison Beard, points to a growing body of happiness books that promise to help people strive to be happy.

However, since about 2009 there is also a growing trend in rethinking happiness. With titles such as Bright-sided; Rethinking Positive Thinking; The Upside of Your Dark Side; The Upside of Stress; Beyond Happiness; and The Happiness Industry – How the Government and Big Business Sold us Well-Being, most are telling readers about a new message – the relentless promotion of happiness might be counterproductive. The obsession with thinking that you have to feel happy all the time is stressful.

The authors of these books are not arguing against happiness, but that it should be moderated by aspiring for a ‘generally happy life’ rather than ‘an always happy life.’

They say that instead of striving for ‘happiness’ people should be aspiring to reach a state of ‘long-term fulfillment.’ Hence the word ‘happy’ should be replaced with the word ‘flourishing.’ For example, instead of asking ‘Are you happy?’ the question should be, ‘Are you flourishing?’ Others, such as Arianna Huffington, use the word ‘thriving.’ As in, ‘Are you thriving?’ Others think the question should be, ‘Do you love life?’ – in other words, giving happiness an external aspect rather than an internal one.

Daily or constant happiness, the author of the article states, is not the means to long-term fulfillment. People pursue fulfillment in different ways, and in life there are cycles or waves of happy times and not so happy times. But the aim is to have, over a longer period of time, a ‘generally happy life.’

But does lack of fulfillment mean unhappiness? Should people wish others a fulfilled birthday? And what would children sing at school – If you’re ~~happy~~ flourishing and you know it clap your hands? And what would Pharrell Williams sing? Clap along if you feel like ~~happiness~~ fulfillment is the truth … Maybe Bobby McFerrin would sing Don’t Worry, Be ~~Happy~~ Fulfilled.

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